It is well

So, I've been struggling for a while now. I've come to a patch in my life which is really affecting me in so much that I do, emotionally I am all over the place and it's a bit of a mess. I keep getting reminded of Paul's 'thorn in his side' and God's grace being sufficient. I am reminded of Jesus' prayer at Gethsemane as He lays down His will for the Father's. But still I am suffering, I am down, I am sad...however hard or honestly I pray. As you are reading this you might be thinking I don't have enough faith, or I need to pray harder or maybe you're shouting at your screen there is no God...

If we are promised that everything we pray for in Jesus' name will be ours then why am I suffering? If I am promised a hope that will never disappoint, then why am I disappointed? What does it mean to rejoice in our sufferings? It is a preposterous idea, how can we do that??

So often we look at the gospel, see that it saves us and then move on. We say that we need to go into deeper things, look into sanctification, the gospel is elementary. But the gospel is our hope, it is our joy and always will be. It is the foundation of the hope, it is the one and only thing that brings us true joy.

For God did not appoint us to suffer wrath but to receive salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ. He died for us so that, whether we are awake or asleep, we may live together with Him. (1 Thessalonians 5:9-10)

That's it, the gospel that gives me hope that brings me joy. And this is where it all changes, although I am sad, weary, alone, tired and longing for healing, I am joyful.

Though I am sad, I rejoice in hope. Though I am broken, I know Christ is with me. Though I cry for this world, I am joyful for salvation. In all of this, in all my sufferings, in all the thorns my hope is in Christ alone, my hope is in the gospel. It is the power of God.

So even though my prayers are unanswered, I suffer, I am disappointed, I feel forsaken...because of Christ it is well. I can rejoice in spite of all this and say, it is well with my soul.